What is God doing?
So yeah! here I am 17 hours from the home I’ve always known in pursuit of more of God and for the glory of God to be revealed in and through me. If anyone would have told me 6 months ago that I’d be here, I’d say No Way but here I am. I thought that coming here would somehow awaken something in me that wasn’t there before and that everyday would be full of God’s glory. But no!! 
Instead, God is working behind my back.
Last weekend was a real turning point in not only this internship, but in my marriage and inside all of us interns. We all felt it even though we couldn’t necessarily describe exactly what it was. Craig said something that really struck me. He said how sometimes you’re in a place where you don’t really feel like God is doing anything. You don’t feel extremely anointed, or full of purpose, but it’s precisely during this time that you’re growing in leaps and bounds because God is working behing your back. You wake up one day and realize that you are not the same person that you were yesterday.
That’s what happened to me beginning last weekend till today. My marriage 
has changed for the better all of a sudden, I feel like I can really minister to people because I do have something to give. All of a sudden all of us living in the house are a family. One night God moved and here we are on the other side wondering what the heck just happened.
God is not doing what I thought He would do (of course…) instead He is working behind the scenes and pushing me to mature and step on my own two feet. It’s time for me to really grow up. It’s like a bird in a nest that’s ready to fly. it stands right at the edge of the nest and before long, he’s flying!! Just like that. All the while the mother is the one who pushes him out of the nest. She knows that he will never learn to fly until he is forced to.
No matter how it looks in the natural, this time is full of glory because God is here. I trust now that He is doing something even when I don’t feel it. He is giving me what I need right now….not necessarily what I think I want or should have. Yay God!!
Filed under Lucrece | Comments (5)where am i ?!?!?
So hear i am in this “season” is that what it is called? i find my self constantly trying to define, explain and justify my “season” when i feel like i cant even achieve an understanding of the mystery God is revealing to me. How can i understand the thing that i see? It looks like a trail some days, a joyful encounter the next, other days it is fight, some times its dream beautiful and peaceful, and all the while a never ending adventure. As banning says, “the difference between those who do something for God and those who don’t is that the people that do something actually do something” so here i am doing something for God. And things are happening yet never like i think. (surprise) 
The other day i had the opportunity to pray for this lady i had met. she had pain in her back and a muscle problem that made her constantly tense she was on pain medication but it was not working, and on top of all that…..well she just really needed to feel Gods love. so she started to tell me about her back pain and the life threatening operation that she needed but couldn’t afford. so i felt that it was a good opportunity and i went for it. I said to her well i can fix that for you. she said, well you do massages that’s great. i said, no it is all through God, and i told her to stick her arms out and she did, one was about a half an inch shorter. showed it to her and she said, well i’ll be darned, i told her that it would grow out, it began to grow slowly but surely. after it had finished growing i should it to her and she thought i had done an trick or something. The power of God was all over her she almost fell over. i said well let me do your legs, and she said alright but first let me have a cigarette, so she had her cigarette and i just talk to her about her life (people don’t care what you know until they know that you care) after that i sat her down measured her legs and sure enough one leg about a half an inch shorter than the other. So i grow it out and this time the power of God is so strong i half to hold on to her to keep her from falling, she starts lipping around because she is not used to walking this way. I also knew that she had bad joints in her hands so i said to her, you want me to do your hands to? she said, sure go for it. i got a hold of her hands in mine and i didn’t even pray i simply said God fix what needs to be fixed. And i began to to feel her joints popping it was wild!! i said can you feel that? She said, oh yah! and after that she was completely pain free.
Between the In-Betweens
So this past Sunday I was driving home from a conference and I pulled up to my house and saw that my roommate wasn’t home and was kinda sad cause I didn’t want to go into an empty house, but I wanted to be home. Well, it got me thinking myself right into a God moment. You see the past few weeks I think everyone’s been scrambling trying to figure out whats going on spiritually, and we’re all slowly starting to get the picture, and one of the things I heard that really spoke to me was how we were like Jacob that had worked 7 years for Rachel and instead got Leah,
and he didn’t want her, but Leah could produce for him and Rachel couldn’t. And we’re all kinda in this place of we think we know what we want and need, and we know there are great things were called to, but they haven’t been handed to us in fullness at this point and the little bit we’ve been given (that we were so excited about) is not at all what we expected, and at times can feel like its not fulfilling, but it is producing! SO back to my driveway, so I’m sitting there about to get out of my car
and I think to myself about how I hate when you’re going from one place to another (whether in real life or metaphorically) and you know that no matter whether you were to go back to the old place or get to the new place that once you get out of your car and walk into that place you are going to have to face that big fat ugly empty feeling, 
and there’s no way of escaping it, but sometimes for a few small minutes you can feel safe and those feelings feel a little bit less when you’re on your way there, in your car. Because even though you’re going from no where special to no where special you still feel like you’re going somewhere, and it feels safe if only for a moment. So that’s when that phrase ran through my head, ‘between the in-betweens’, sometimes it feels easier to be between places, especially when where were headed feels empty, but it’s actually in those places that God produces the most in you. So take that moment in your car and enjoy it, but get out and face the hard places and start looking for fruit, cause it’s there.
Lacey
