when im forty im going to be kicken!!!
so i hear people all the time say “I’m to old for this” or “I’m to old” or ”I’m past my prime” well I’m telling you when I’m forty I’m going to be kicken. why do we put a time limit on God we almost tell him “God if you going to do something you better do it soon” as if God is even remotely interested in our time line for ourselves. the bible says that a day to the lord is like a thousand years to us. so…….. basically God has a totally messed up clock and calender and the only way he is on time is because he is not in time. kinda crazy that God is omnipresent in other words is not affected by time or space so if he is not limited by time or space in my life he can do what ever he wants and what is going on can be completely apart from time. like Caleb in the bible i want to be storming mountains and taking on the giants in the land. Joshua was over forty when he led the people into the promise land. so what is your destiny? what is your dream? because time is no longer an excuse.
Filed under Jesse | Comments (5)the attack of the ear eating bugs!!!!!!!
okay… so there i was in my room laying on my bed talking to my dad when suddenly i hear a voice calling my name with some what of a urgent yet quiet tone but surprisingly loud for the person who i new it belonged to. i immediately new that it was Alyssa and that something was up. now as a bit of a side note Alyssa is a soft spoken person of very few words………. that you can hear, that is to say when she says something we all go “what!” so i rush to the stairs and she says “i have a bug on my ear and i cant get it off!” so i try and remove the little guy but i couldn’t, i realized at first glance it was i tick and there really is only one way to get a tick off and that is a liter, luckily i had one handy. some singed hair and a few seconds later no more tick and still some what freaking out Alyssa. it was quite the experience and has probably the potential of becoming a memory that will cause some laughs later.
Filed under Jesse | Comments (5)if i just had more time to smell the flowers
do you ever want to sleep away a day? do you ever wish you could stop time? wouldnt it be great if you could get everything done on time that you planned and still had energy? i feel like the more i rest and relax the more i realize how much it is so vital. sense being in moravian falls i feel like i am suspended in time, that as i am here the world is still spinning every where else. it feels like im in the “now what” stage. but the funny thing is i know “what” it just that it isnt time yet.
the truth is we all say “if i just had more time” but the real truth is not what is important but what is essential to you. in a world of fast pace and fast food it is so easy to sacrifice our selves for the needs of those around us but where is the balance where is the understanding of knowing when to go in to the wilderness for a while and when do you minister to the multitude? i find myself learning what is the priority what is essential to the plan and destiny God has given me.
it is said that time is our most precious commodity its worth can only be measured by what we do with the time we have. we never stop always trying to use our time to the best of our ability, striving every second of every day to reach some goal that we have set for our selves never satisfied when we reach it.
i have heard it said that you should “take the time to smell the flowers” i have started to do that every time i see a flower take the time to smell it enjoy its color and unique shape and design, think about it and wonder how God could make such a beautiful thing.
i have found that if i really want to find God i have to take time to find the beauty in everything.
Filed under Jesse | Comments (3)
umm….. i cant think of a good title
well where do i start…… it has been crazy. i went to Florida April 1 and let me tell you it is amazing. it started out like any other conference the normal uneasy feeling in the air. people getting there faith and hunger set by what they hear and feel. we ran the book tables for Craig and several other ministries making small talk with conference junkies and missionaries, preachers and intercessors. first night i met a lady who had found a gem in her bath tub while she was cleaning and im talking pretty nice size for a diamond that was pretty cool to actually see. close down the book table and went in to service and got swept into worship. a guy named Roy fields was leading worship who now is Todd’s main worship guy. throughout the week we met many of fresh fires staff and associates and even connected with many of the locals. gospel, Austin (Gospel is an intern Austin new somebody who new Craig) and myself were staying with a older couple who were elders in the church. Dennis and Georgia egge lived in this wonderful little condo on a gulf course (like the rest of Florida). they were amazing took out to eat and did everything they could to make us feel at home. Georgia is missionary to all over but mostly to Peru where she trains pastors. if you want talk about a hard core lady this is it, eating grubs and ants, monkey and sloth just about anything that i considered way out there she ate it. a lot of what we did was catching and making sure speakers had water, helping setup crew and taking care of the book tables. i honestly cant remember all the healings that happened in the first couple of days but being at the book tables gave us several opportunities for praying and seeing miracles. a ladies arms and legs grew out i remember and there other people who just wanted to get rocked. to be completely honest there was not a hole lot of opportunity for us to minister however we did get opportunity to serve the people who were so in many ways it was a good thing because as most people who go to a healing conference are they have the mind set that (if only Todd prays for me then it will happen).the first night Todd went right after that mind set and started talking about if you really want your miracle you will just reach up and get it he talked about in faith moving testing it out. and believing God for your miracle. Todd really wanted people to have the mind set beyond the prayer line. i was really glad to see God moving in a more sovereign way where it isnt about the man of God it is about God doing it and you receiving directly from him no more middle man. Craig was preaching the morning sessions and he blew everyone out of the water, there was kinda a mindset of your just one of Todd’s interns so your not going to be as good as him. but Craig definitely held his own and there at the beginning of the meetings there were more testimonies of people getting healed in the morning session than the night. we did have one opportunity to minister where criag called us up and introduced us and let us call out words of knowledge and as always everyone is looking at everyone like im not going first you go first, so i went first i called out what i saw and i really didnt have anything before i got up there. but hay open your mouth and God will fill it if you let him. it was cool because it was easy know sweat just bam here it is, it was kinda funny because i was getting to the place in the spirit where i didnt even need to think i just spoke i looked at this lady who responded to a word i called out and said are you in ministry and i immediately knew she did youth related ministry.
there was one instant where the power of God got on me so strong that it was wild. craig had called us up to pray and i went up to this lady and she looks at me and said that she and her son were living on the street and that she had health issues and her son was going through a ruff time and i felt this wave hit me i could barley stand and every time i tried to say something i couldn’t i just stood there and cried i couldnt even look at her i held her hands and just was so over whelmed. through this experience i felt the Lord saying you dont say anything if your spirit is not behind it. and he said if your spirit is behind it do you really need to say anything? i felt that God was showing me that i had moved toward a place of knowing what to say and how to say it and it was still God yet not allowing the heart of God to fully come through. how many times have i said something that spiritually looks good and sounds edifying and it is but we dont allow are own heart to be wounded for that person or situation.
kinda in the same train of thought the Lord has been speaking to me on a total new form of prophesy that to be honest is really just encouragement. several times God has lead me to encourage people in away that we see as normal and kinda ordinary.
instead of saying God loves you he wants the best for you he wants to honor you he thinks your amazing God say your special. God has led me to say i love you i want to honor you i think your amazing i think your special. so much of the world is looking for someone to approve of them and while saying that God loves you is so amazing is important the lord has showed me that as a brother as a friend as son i need to show my approval of the people around me. we were helping craig in the morning session and he was about done he said i want all my interns to come here and so we all went and stood up front and he said” you guys are amazing you have done an awesome job i love you guys so much” and then he had the whole church stretch there hands toward us and he prayed a blessing over us.
now if he would have stood me up there and said God loves you and he said you did an amazing job i would have been like i know but when he honored us in front of everyone it really meant something to me.
another instants of this was when we were all in the green room and one of todds staff had hurt his knee and was unable to put any weight on it so they sat him down and got him some ice little while later i saw todd getting this guy a plate of food todd got done getting it got him all set up and looked at him and said do you need anything else? wow im telling you to see that genuine caring serving attitude was amazing and this lesson was double edged i felt God saying dont ever get to the place where you cant serve and dont kid your self people are always watching.
the whole time i was there i felt the glory i felt the anointing it was great but through all of that i have learned that healings, miracles, testimonies, the ooey-gooey feeling that you get, shekinah glory, and all the salvations cannot fill the place of a presonnal relationship with God, im not saying that to sound spiritual. i have lost so much of the shine that goes with the relationship, i feel God teaching me to not have my relationship placed in some encounter or visitation. i hear some people say i had this angelic encounter ten years ago and i feel like saying what has God said for the last ten years? what did God say this morning. right now i am just connecting to God through the air i breath through the sky and clouds i connect through the sound of birds i feel drawn to the creator through creation. not really through worship or soaking not through hours in prayer just living and letting God stay close to me in those moments he always has my ear and maybe he doesn’t say anything my heart is always open to his call. in summary i am in a season of falling in love with just Jesus, not the miracle Jesus, not the signs and wonders Jesus, not the savior Jesus, not even the fiery eyed Jesus, just Jesus. i find that is all i am in love with right now it is not intoxicating it is not earth shaking it is just drawing.
maybe know one can relate but my soul has been so restless and it feels like the next season is so close the next thing is close i feel like a kid at Christmas the fact that dont know what is in the present is killing me more than what the present is it self so please keep me in your prayers as i trust God that he knows what he is doing. blessings jes
Filed under Jesse | Comments (2)signs and wonders
over my life time i have seen some really cool things and sense my life in a way has only just begun i am looking forward to bigger things. yet there is a time in every-ones life where we are looking for a sign from God something to tell us that we are on the right path. then suddenly the sign shows up we all wonder was that God? and yet we pray all the time “reveal your self God” it is the nature of man to want to see God. it is something that is part of our heart is to see him and his power. even unbelievers will tell you “show it to me” they challenge it out of the hope that it may actually work and that God might show up. 
i am 18 teen and my heart brakes every time i see a kid sitting in church and i can see that they are totally out of what is being said and done and what hurts is i cant blame them. my life i have seen a good truthful gospel being preached yet i see that a revelation of the truth with out a application of that truth does nothing. in Hosea 4:6 it says “My people perish for lack of knowledge. because you have rejected knowledge” the reason why we perish is not because we did not know, the reason why we perish is because we know yet we reject it. i worked with guy who was an atheist yet his mom worked at a church he went to the youth group (to play pool) he new that there was a God and as we talked it was clear that God had really nothing to offer him in his mind. he told me one day “if i had to choose id be a Christian” he knew what he needed yet didnt want to leave a life of “freedom” to live a life of “rules”. we would talk and talk about God and what life was about. he did drugs had “relationships” and had enough of religion he was my age and truly wanted a destiny yet he was so wounded by the church that he couldnt see a loving Jesus. during my time there i trained a guy who was a bit older than me and had one of the most messed up views on everything spiritual so he would pump me full of questions about God and healing and stuff and he was genuine in the things he would ask me, there were several times we would be in the middle of stocking shelves all the while having a discussion about God and several times i had a well meaning christian would interject a comment about Jesus being the Lord of Lords and the King of Kings and this guy would just look at them like what does that mean? i truly believe that people dont care what you know until you know that you care. youth dont care what you know until you get on there level and look at them straight in the eyes and begin to see what they are dealing with. i had met some kids this last week at church and decided to go hang out at youth group with them a lot of these kids have crazy stories even though i dont know all of there stories you can tell some have been through junk and that is putting it nicely and so i go and hang out and talk to some of them before it starts. i had decided i would keep quiet and not cause to much trouble. they talked about the prophetic and hearing God and as i listened i could relate to how a lot of these kids were feeling they had gotten excited about God and all they wanted to do is get to know God yet they were dealing with the confusion of voices and feelings and “how do i” and “what dont i”. has i was just listening to what was being spoken my head began to get very hot. witch is usually it is God telling me he is about to show up and show off. the youth pastor looked at me and said “what is your story?” i started telling everyone about the things ive been apart of. healing rooms, firestorm, mentorships, and healing and prophetic schools. i started talking about miracles and seeing legs and arms grow and as i began telling testimonies of healing. the whole time my head getting hotter and hotter. then i felt like i just needed to do something supernatural so i said “hay is there anyone hear with back pain right now” sure enough one girl had some back pain and so i said to youth pastor is it alright if i pray for her and he said yes so i said “stand up and stick out your arms” she stood and stuck out her arms and sure enough one was shorter than the other one by a half an inch i said “watch this it is going to grow out” i began to tell the arm to grow and with out even touching her they began to grow she got very hot and started to shake. they grew out until they were even and i turned around and said “it is that simple” the other kids started asking all these questions and some wanted prayer for healing this one kid who had a ball hit one of his fingers while playing baseball got completely healed as i was praying for him his hands got covered in gold dust and oil. another kid who had flat feet had instant improvement. the same girl who had her arms grown out asked me to pray for her tail bone. so i told her to reach down until it hurts and she could only go about as far as her knees. so i grew out her legs and then told her to reach down and touch her toes, so she reached down and touched her toes the power of God was so real in that place it was so good. after stuff settled down this guy said to me “when you started talking about growing out legs and stuff i thought you were full of crap, but now i apologize”. youth are looking for a real gospel and i intend to give it to them. i pray that this will not make you applaud, or feel warm and fuzzy, i pray that this will embolden you. i pray it will make you jealous. i pray that it will make you hungry. jes
